The Indomitable Spirit!

12 May

@ Mumbai 1995

Every year this day is special as it is my parents anniversary. They have been together now for 56 years and going strong! Got bogged down with a host of things and it’s been sometime since I blogged. Here it resumes…

For a person who was at the forefront of action in the family for more than 60 years, a fall crossing train tracks was the first indication that something was wrong. In May 97 Father could not suddenly walk as his right leg would not take his command.  It was perplexing and we started discovery of the neural world. The best of the surgeons at Apollo spotted a tumor in his brain, after variety of CT, MRI scans and angiography. The first time I experienced what modern hospitals were capable of – create fear psychosis and fleece! Fortunately we had our cousin Chakkarai anna to wade through the maze. After extensive internal debate they decided to use a ‘X Knife” (a hi-tech expression to me then),  a radiation therapy over few weeks to shrink thebrain tumor as that was felt to impede his limbs. But a week or 2 later there was no relief and it worsened so much so that his legs were stiff like a log of wood. Panic and a few MRIs later a tumor in the spine was discovered and it was clear that caused the problem and not the one in brain. Fortunately both were benign tumors.  But the radiotherapy had to finish its course and have a cooling period before surgery for the spine.  

What started in April as a visit to hospital took till July end for the surgery to get over and get back home. He was still not mobile and had to go through physiotherapy for many months to get partial mobility. Children scattered across the globe - Ram was based in US, Me in Mumbai, Anandhi in Kuwait and Sandya in Singapore,  the one always by his side, as always, was Amma.

I don’t think anybody explained at length the risks or side effects of what he went through. Radiotherapy in the brain can lead to epileptic attacks(fits) for life and he had to be anti-epileptic drugs.

@ DC in 2004

After a year of strenuous physiotherapy he started to stand and walk with support. Otherwise normal we did not know he had to be shielded from emotional shocks. Our neighbour passed away and he went to their home and had his first epileptic attack. Such an attack meant hospitalization for minimum a couple of weeks, in and out of ICU, sedation, high dose of neuro drugs to prevent relapse and then mobilsation. Bed rest meant he again lost mobility and took afresh another  3-6 months of physiotherapy to regain partial mobility. 

Through all this the two things always in abundance with both Amma and Appa were hope and will. They always had it to have brought up four of us with all their sacrifices. But we were small and never noticed or realized it earlier but this phase brought it all out and repeatedly so.

For little did we realize the twists and turns medical treatment could cause. That prolonged anti-epilectic drugs suppresses cortisone required to fight stress from fever etc. Fever or a stomach upset could cause an attack of fits setting him back. This added steroids to the course. Though mild over a period they can cause reduced sodium and potassium levels again causing fits and a set back. From time to time different triggers caused fits and a setback. They have been through this 6 or 7 times over the last 19 years in different places - Chennai, Bangalore, Mumbai but every time bounced back and gone through it together. We all may have pitched in temporarily from time to time but they took the fight.

@ Golden Jubilee 2010 in Pune

Through all this they never ceased to enjoy life. The festivals and functions. Trips to Mumbai, Pune, Singapore, US – daring when the doc says ‘I advice not to travel’ . Sitting in his bed father’s weather reports would be accurate. Always abreast with the happenings in the extended family and the world; always willing to embrace the latest developments @80+ they skype, email and whatsapp; switching from cassettes to cds to mp3 players, more than anything managing a home and hosting even today. Always remembering and being the first to wish near and dear. 

There will always be situations far better or worse than these. But how do you describe what people go through or how they go through and bounce back? A child fall sick and bounces back. Probably anabolism makes them resilient. For my parents I could only attribute it to their love, hope and will to fight – the indomitable spirit.

Happy Anniversary Sury & Prema!