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| Prema Sury |
As we started schooling while school and friends took center stage and consumed our time, Parents silently painted the background. I don't think my parents had the likes of Dr.Spock's inputs about bringing us up but had their own home grown style focused on building values, contributing to family, encouraging experiences and allowing each of us our space.
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Home minister
Amma had the arduous task of managing things at home and the 4 of us alone, as Dad was away at office, was frequently on tour and the rest of the family of relatives was in Chennai.
Live within your means
She managed the household within tight budgets, always frugal, testing the need and allowing us to spend only within limits - no tips, easy money and we had to be accountable.
Leverage resources
She would get each of us to do our bit for the family. I think I got a better share as Ram got busy with studies, sisters were kids and I had the winged cycle. A host of domestic chores came to me from getting the coffee bean ground for filter coffee, ration shop, placing order with the grocer or vegetables and fruits from the market ...little experiences that shape living.
Stretch when you have to
She had to see us all off leave for school after breakfast, then get set for Mayilsami who would pick our lunch box and cycle it to school for delivery. On days when there is Puja at home, she had to double up to feed the deities and then pack the lunch box , all before 1030 else Mayilsami will not wait and we miss lunch.
Eat well - it always matters
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| Sandhya's Annaprasanam |
In the evening when we are back she had to be ready to feed the ravenous lot and rush my sisters for Paattu (singing) class. For instance if it was idli it was multicourse at least 4 each with Sambar, chutney, milagai podi (gunpowder), rasam, sugar laced with ghee and even curd and sugar - so kitchen was a food factory. And weekend meant the house had to be filled with munchies and she had the eternal duel with me of splitting and hiding it else I would finish it and before she knows. The games of figuring out where all she could hide it and finishing it without her knowing it was fun.
Lunch is not always free
But she used to task us smartly - so if it was chidai - we would sit and roll the dough into tiny balls or dice the flattened dough for diamond shaped biscuits. Or if one wanted coconut burfi, I had to peel the coir off the full coconuts from the tree at home.
All through she never put pressure on studies maybe because it was on autopilot. And then we would have relatives come from time to time to go to Ooty or Guruvayur or just spend time with us. The major break for her was music and Teacher's Gita classes but boy she always was and is the goddess of sacrifice. It always felt good to assist her figuring out her discomfort as even to date she will never voice it or ask for anything.
Mr.Prim & Proper
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| at Malampuzha Ram & me wearing designer combo shirts |
For father things had to be clean, in its place (something like the Japanese 5S except we did not have charts). He was always conscientious, keen on making us experience many things. Working in Binny (erstwhile textile superbrand) he had a great sartorial sense and would experiment with styles with our Family tailor TA Verghese. Note the designer combo shirts in the pic - the body and cuffs had attractive checks while the collar, sleeve and blazer like pockets contrasted in white.
Share Experiences
He would go on tours in South TN and Kerala and get delicacies and fruits special from that place. When he gets back he would at length talk about his experiences on the trip, the stay, the travel if he met any relative about them etc.
Explore
In late 70s if I had holidays and was well behaved in the near past I could join him for day trips or short trips and where we went if the company he was visiting allowed I could see the factories. Things operated lost more on trust and this way I remember seeing a hosiery factory, a sugar mill, paper factory some engineering units and also seeing other towns like Salem, Erode, Trichy, Mettur, Tiruppur, Ooty, Udumalpet, Bhavani etc. One could also at times go to his office or Binny's textile showroom and be behind the counter with the salesmen. He had this circular dial he had devised with Windows which would have his team's tour plan monthwise calendarised in quadrants.
Stay healthy- stay fit
He was health conscious and in consultation with our Family doc Dr.Sridhar Bhat would make us have a host of stuff. As I was into sports Ferradol, Rarical ( calcium supplement) , Liv 52 etc. were introduced to support. It also stretched to me having eggs. As the egg could not enter the house, a pariah glass was dedicated in which milk was given and a fresh egg would be broken in the verandah straight into the glass of milk, shaken and swallowed. It did not last long as I could never develop a taste for eggs.
The Sound of Music
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| Ragasudha - now in chennai |
Fathers friend S V Krishnan started this unique Carnatic music club called Ragasudha having monthly and in season weekly concerts in a small hall. During week the place had music classes my sister's went to. I was egged to join but didn't take to it. We had to go for concerts to Ragasudha. Initially I used to feel bored and we kids would get chatting and get reprimanded (most stern was from late Sri.Maharajapuram Santanam). But we got to see stalwarts performing. Mr. Santanam became a good friend to family and if in Coimbatore Amma's Thavalai Dosai and Tomato Chutney was a must serve for him. Another annual season were concerts in Marghazhi at temples. Post dinner we would go in the car, park, sit in the car go into the pandal and listen. MVS, Madurai Simi, Targa Jayalakshmi, TVS, Semmangudi, Lalgudi Jayaraman, Yesudas ... the music cast an unmatched aura in the silent night. The Late Mr.Krishnan later shifted to Chennai and ste up the Ragasudha Hall in Mylapore which I am told is run by his daughter now - that's some passion for promoting classical carnatic music by a pure music lover
Thank God
Saturday meant a visit to Ramar Kovil and if everybody cannot go I still had to go get archana done and get prasadam.
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| Perur Temple - Coimbatore |
Guide
For visitors I was prepared well to be the local guide. Within city it was a tour to Marudhamalai, Perur (a magnificient temple), VOC park (if kids were there) ,climaxed with Annapoorna & Gowri Shankar with its family roast and sometimes topped with a movie at KG compliex an early multiplex. Out of town mostly was to Ooty & Coonoor or Malampuzha dam. Nilgiri trip was dotted with Doddabetta, botanical gardens, Sims park, the glass house, racecourse and Dasaprakash, lake, train ride between coonoor and pity and for the adventurous Mudumalai, Pykara falls, Thoda's hut...
Celebrate traditions
Star birthdays (as per birth star) were important new dresses and a very special sweet made at home. All festivals had to be celebrated in as traditional way as possible. So Ganesha had to be a hand made clay Ganesha, Pongal in the open backyard, Krishna jayanti with Krishna's footprint Kolam...Diwali was the most anticipated. Purchase of crackers would be from the wholesale market a fortnight in advance. As Diwali in South coincides with monsoon the crackers could be damp so we kids would lay out the stock on a sunny day in advance so that they burst well on the DDay. Every Diwali or wedding would mean the dress to be stitched had to be of a new and unique style. And sweets and savouries had to be distributed to all the neighbours ...
Parents opened windows to the world,much before Bill Gates took over.., what we picked stayed...





1 comment:
The account gets getting better and better! Your story is so similar to several stories yet unique and lovely!
Thank you for sharing!
www.kaviarasu.com
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